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They say you don't know what you've got until it's gone, I realize how true this is now more than ever! We were never supposed to be, it started with a ride down constitution and ended up being the greatest ride of my life! Look I know I hurt you in many ways. And I know you aren't stupid at all, you know I did things that I regret so much now! I just could never bring myself to admit them to you bcuz I didnt want to hurt you :( and I was sick and prideful. I didnt realize what you meany to me then either. I mean we got along great and the sex was phenomenal but I was not used to anyone caring about me and I thought you would be gone like all the rest. But then you weren't. .. you stuck by my side like no-one EVER has! This is when I realized what you truly meant to me ; ( but this was already too late bcuz you were slipping away with each day I couldn't be there for you. Then you weren't there at all and I couldn't do anything about it. I refused to believe you had found another. It didn't make any sense with all that I knew about you. I was crushed! To think that you could give to another man what you had kept from me in so little time? Then I heard rumors of what his name was and that you were living together. Another blow to the heart. How could this be? I try to block you out but I can't, I cant even look at another woman bcuz none of them are you. Then today I look on your page and see that you changed your relationship to civil union. That leads me to wonder is it a woman? This honestly would be much easier for me to cope with bcuz it leaves the blame on me having hurt you rather than you giving to another man what I could not have. I know that I have messed things up and I know that you now love someone else and I will probably never have another chance with the best thing to ever happen to me! I honestly don't know how to get over this or if I ever will. I can't lie I pray every night and twenty times a day that you would give me another chance to make you my queen now that my life is going well. But I know that is very unlikely and I can't blame you. I love you Grace (yea I know you hate that but it is truly beautiful like you!)and I miss falling asleep wuth you in my arms. I hope you have everything that you deserve even if I can't be the one to give it to you and I am so sorry that I ever hurt you! With love forever and always, Your one
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